May 12, 2021

New Series Launch: Social Wisdom Episode 1: Taylor Yu

Hello my fellow Chamingers! Today we have amazing news. We can finally officially announce our New Series Launch: Social Wisdom. This is going to be a show were we can significantly increase the amount of viewpoints present on Chaminger. We interview guests from all ages and demographics with very unique backgrounds and stories. The whole point is to hear their perspective and have them identify the key advice that helped change or improve their life significantly for the better. Don’t sleep on the super power of learning from others.

Today marks the release of our first episode where we have the opportunity to interview an old friend. While he might be young and starting his journey into the work force, you get to hear how powerful it is to be a foreigner, and a traveler. There is incredible insight to broadening your horizons and seeing how the world really works.

Check out new episodes every single Wednesday. Remember that we are always looking for guests. Send us an email at if you would be interested to share your wisdom, you never know who will resonate with your journey. Check out the audio and transcript of our entire episode below. We appreciate you for starting the journey to #BecomingXceptional with us!

Additionally, we have released multiple new DAILY CC episodes – our vlog that showcases the behind-the-scenes of Chaminger and what it takes to build a brand and podcast from zero! Watch here!

Listen to our New Series Launch: Social Wisdom

Social Wisdom Episode #1: Taylor Yu
Social Wisdom Episode #1: Taylor Yu

And read along – the transcript:

Fabian: Hola from Chaminger. My name is Fabian Chagoya and I’m your host of Social Wisdom. How do you know what to work on to improve? By being exposed to what is actually possible or obtainable. A major goldmine of untapped knowledge and experience is learning from others, Social Wisdom. Be a sponge, save yourself countless lessons and years of figuring it out the hard way by absorbing it firsthand from others. And here we go. 

Today on Social Wisdom, we’re going to be exploring the advice from our guest, Taylor Yu. Hey Taylor, how are you doing today?

Tyalor: Hello? Good you? 

Fabian: I’m doing excellent. It’s exciting to be able to do this with you for two reasons in my mind. One, because we hung out in person years ago in Seattle. We met through a mutual friend. And two, just to be able to now remotely, we’re in different States, and reconnect over a podcast and a completely different thing is to me insane. Like how does that feel to you?

Tyalor: Uh, it feels kind of crazy cause everything just kind of like all turned to remote after COVID and after everything hit. I was actually out of the country. So it was kinda crazy trying to get back into the U.S. and everything.

Fabian: Where were you at? If you don’t mind me asking.

Tyalor: Vietnam.

Fabian: Oh, so you actually had gone out, did it like happen like right before, during, or how was the situation?

Tyalor: I was actually visiting my wife’s family in Vietnam and we were over there for three months from December 26th, so right after Christmas and then to March 20, it was supposed to be March 26, but because of COVID, my parents were like freaking out. They’re like, you need to come home now. They’re going to close the airports. They’re going to not let you back in the U.S. 

Fabian: How was it coming back to the U.S. and how did it differ in Vietnam in your opinion? 

Tyalor: So in Vietnam, they actually, they did a very good job of actually stopping COVID. Late January, it hit Vietnam pretty hard and that’s when the realization woke up and it was like, this could be pretty serious. So they had like locked down everything. They closed all the bars, all family businesses were closed. No one was able to go out after a certain time in Vietnam. If they did, they’d toss you back and be like, Hey, you can’t go here, this is closed. They give you a ticket or they enforced laws. Um, It was kind of scary to be honest, because at first I wasn’t really too worried about the virus itself. It was just the authority there. Right? 

And then on my way back, I was like, Oh, it’s just kind of like a flu, it’ll go away, right? It’s not that bad. And then the numbers started slowly increasing during my two week quarantine. I actually had to stay at my parents and my landlord was like, Hey, don’t come back for two weeks. Stay somewhere else for two weeks and then come back to the house. So yeah, it was pretty crazy. 

Fabian: So obviously that was huge, especially because kind of like you got to see two different countries handle it very differently. Which, I mean, the U.S. definitely lacked the, the ballsiness I guess we can call it, right? To enforce these things. My question to you then is, so you came back and all of a sudden things are changing. People are telling you, Hey, you got a quarantine. How did this start effecting your mindset? You come back and then all of a sudden, like no one is going to be hiring, or tell us a little more about that.

Tyalor: I had used to fundraise. They had halted, the governor had halted all businesses and that they were not allowed to fundraise in person. So I came back, I was like, okay, well I’m still hired by them, but we’re basically on furlough. So we don’t have anywhere to go. I was collecting unemployment. I honestly didn’t want to go back to work. Cause unemployment started paying more then my actual job. 

I wasn’t spending because we were quarantined, just getting basic necessities. And then, uh, everything started opening up, spending more money. And then my mindset kind of just came from like lazy, didn’t want to go back to work because of the uh, unemployment. And then after eight months, my parents were actually like, Hey, you should probably go back to work somewhere. And I ended up working for Toyota Forklift Northwest. So you know how a forklift looks, there’s a big counterweight that holds the forklift from tilting over. We repair that and make it look brand new and also so that they can resell it and all that.

So I started working, mindset started to be like, I don’t want to go to work. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to do this. And then now I had realized that I basically wasted a whole 11 months at that time, after the eight months of doing nothing, not improving, my wife basically pointed out that I had done nothing. It was like played games all day, stayed home, eat, sleep, come back, do the same thing every single day.

Fabian: You felt like you weren’t accomplishing anything. My question to you is, was it out of like almost necessity? So what I mean by that is COVID hit, pandemic hit. You were in Vic, on vacation somewhere, you come back, your life completely turns around. All of a sudden you can’t do your job anymore, which is kind of crazy. Like, do you feel like that, let’s just call it laziness, but it really was just not doing anything outside of home life. Was it you, your body and your mental health just basically saying, Hey, I need to like recover and stabilize because so much is going on or do you think it actually was just like, you were like, okay, I can kind of chill right now because of unemployment and all this stuff

Tyalor: I think it was partially from also me coming back from Vietnam and not working for three months. That kind of made it like to the point where it’s like, okay, I don’t want to do anything and transition back into, you know, work, grind, get to where want to be, improve.

Fabian: The vacation after the vacation, you have to like, change your mindset after that.

Tyalor: Yeah. It’s hard to change after that. So you kind of get stuck in a loop. So it was comfortable at first. I enjoyed it and I was like, okay, four months, I can do this, this is fine. Five months, I’ll look for a job in next month. Six months passed by, my boss had called me up saying, Hey, we’re doing telephone calling. Didn’t want to do that.

Fabian: Yeah. Random cold calling. No, thank you.

Tyalor: It wasn’t, wasn’t for me. And then started to switch into like nine to 10 months in when I got the job at my, the company that my dad works at. It just slowly, it was like, okay, I’m going to start doing this. So now, right now I’m in like the mode where I’m improving myself, also like my mindset and physically as well. 

Fabian: Well, I mean, I think that’s really cool that you kind of saw that, Hey, I need to start doing something about this. I can’t just keep remaining the status quo 9, 10, 11 months. And the next thing you know, it’s end of the year and you haven’t really done anything. And did the concern of like time hit you? Like you were like, Oh my like a year just passed by and nothing major happened.  What was the trigger in your opinion that kind of made you feel like, Hey, things need to change now.

Tyalor: I think the trigger was the time that had actually passed. Cause when I had come back, it was my birthday, I had just turned 23.  A year passed and I was like, Oh crap, I’m 24 now. Um, we kind of have gone through COVID for a whole year and nothing has gotten done. 

It was to the point, like, I need to switch it into gear and start working, start doing this, start improving. Being on this podcast, thank you for having me also, by the way. It was something that I wanted to do and it was out of my comfort zone. So I was like, I should probably try doing new things.

Fabian: Respect man, I like that. I think, number one, I just want to say, from me to, you were both young, but you’re especially still really young dude. The way I view it is you can restart at any point. Like, I would even say like a 45 year old, 50 year old, if they wanted to, like, they could be like, I am done working at being the Starbucks manager in Seattle. I am going to completely change that. I’m going to flip my life around and I’m going to start working towards certain goals or aspirations that I’ve always had. And why can’t you start then? Right. Like the question is, do you not have money? Do you have a certain other obligations? Like, do you have to take care of your parents or your wife or whatever, right? Like those are the things that can change that. But I feel in your case, I mean, you’re young. You have the opportunity to really still discover so many things and try different things and really kind of decide what you want to do.

So I just want to put things in perspective because a lot of the things you’re saying like, Oh, I felt like, I mean, yes, you can say, you could have used your year better, but I really, I wouldn’t be too harsh on yourself because sometimes you have to go to that part in life where you’re like, you didn’t do anything, you were “lazy”, so to speak, you didn’t, you maybe gain weight. You were whatever, right? Like all these things that the society considers not ideal, but you now saw what that was. You saw how you felt. I’m pretty sure you’re probably not going to do it again, unless something terrible happens. Right?

Tyalor: Right now, it’s like also, there’s a lot of stuff that’s like holding me back.  But it all comes down to like making a plan and actually going for it rather than just not doing it.

Fabian: Well, let’s kind of transition to that, I think that’s a really good point. I appreciate all the things you shared. Um, I love the fact that you are working in a completely different field. I’m definitely going to be interested to hear if this job was just a job. Sorry if your bosses are listening, or it’s something actually you were interested in because they are two very different things. But it sounds to me like you have certain goals and you said that there’s certain things holding you back, and those are the things that I want to focus on, but let’s talk about that job piece first.

So you’re working at this forklift place. And that’s something that I find absolutely fascinating because I have no idea where I would even start there, man. Like the stuff like mechanical things and like handy stuff, like I’m okay. But I would much rather, like I was happy when I got money in sales to pay stuff and buy stuff because I’m like, Hey, who wants to fix this for me? Right. So curious, that job, like, did you choose it for a particular reason? Was it money? Was it interest? Tell me more about that.

Tyalor: When I started, it was like, okay. I have like obligations I need to pay for right? Obviously rent, uh, tuition, stuff like that. Stimulus check and the unemployment is not gonna keep, you know, keep funding that. The time passed and it did cover most of it. And then it was the point where like, like I said, my wife pointed out and also it ended up to a point where my parents were also pointing it out saying, you can’t just be sitting at home playing video games all day and not doing anything.

So it was supposed to be just a job, but now I like it. It’s actually, it’s a lot more enjoyable than my previous job. The stress, the amount of time I had to stand outside fundraising in downtown Seattle. The people I had to train for like four or five days straight, making sure that they did their job, but also the fact that when I would train them, they wouldn’t stay. So it was just a bunch of effort put into someone that wasn’t worth the time. 

You can kind of tell when you’re doing a certain job, if someone is going to make it or not, when you’ve done it for a while. They may blow you away, they may surprise you, but it would just end up to be the point where like 90% of the people that I did train and I knew weren’t going to make it, weren’t making it. And only about 10% of the people that I had fully trained did make it. So it was just exhausting. 

Fabian: Well, I think there’s a lot there that I want to talk about. I completely understand why you were exhausted having to train people. Like training people is actually such a valuable skill set. You should be always mentioning that and talking about that from any jobs that you do from now on, because a lot of people don’t realize that training is one of the keys to employee success. Like most jobs that I’ve had, had terrible training and you can set someone up for success. 

Now, one thing that you said was right, is that I feel like a job like that is very similar to the timeshare job where we had met, that job was very sink or swim. They weren’t too particular about who they hired. They wanted to make sure you were okay, but they knew that it was really challenging. So most people couldn’t do it. So I was in charge of training, mentoring people at that time. So I know exactly you’re talking about. I’m like, okay, like you would invest like back, then it used to be two weeks, then they lowered it to three days. But imagine you spend two weeks with one person and then at the 20th day, they leave. You’re like, Oh my goodness, I just wasted all this time. Right? So I completely understand where you’re coming from there.

Tyalor: Also in that same way, it also improves on how you train, right? And also retaining people in fundraising and sales in general, retaining staff to make sure that it doesn’t seem like you’re forcing them and that they’re having fun with their job. I think the reason I did fundraising for so long is because it was fun. I loved making people smile when they would fund like fundraising. They’d be like, Oh, this is going to these kids over in this country and it would. Then seeing the impact that it had on those kids, uh, that they actually were able to see or get letters from in the mail.

Fabian: It’s kind of like your baby, almost like you, it really was something you spent a lot of time in. 

Tyalor: Oh man, it’s just, I have a lot of good memories of it and a lot of like exhausting memories and made a lot of friends though from it though, too, as well.

Fabian: There’s very few jobs that I would even consider going back to that I’ve held and I’ve done really well in pretty much all my jobs. And I’m like, yeah, I don’t know if I would ever go back. The reason why I say that is because since you first started to where you are now, you’ve improved, you’ve grown, you’ve learned, you’re like, Oh, I’m better than I was back then. 

So I’m curious what it is about fundraising. You mentioned one thing that I thought was really interesting is that you liked seeing people smile and that they saw that they’re making an impact and you know, that you’re making an impact.  You want something that will really help someone’s life, that’s one of the things that I got from that, but was it like the socialization aspect. Like what other thing was it that really drew you. 

Tyalor: I think it was more the socialization aspect of it. Also making people laugh during their day. Our job was to stop people on the streets and fundraising and ask them to donate and people in downtown Seattle at the time were like busy. Right? There’s Amazon, there’s um, Oracle, Nordstrom. Microsoft, there’s people walking all over the place from building and building and just getting people to stop from walking past you and stopping and making them laugh. Even if they just don’t stop for you and you say, Hey, like, Oh, you look like someone I know. And they’re like, who? You’re like my new best friend. Just making them laugh or smile throughout their day, it was fun.

If I didn’t hit the quota for the day, It’s more of like, I had a good day, had good conversations, met some really nice people. I think meeting the people over and over that had signed up with me for fundraising and to donate was probably the best part of it. 

I’ve gone twice to Vietnam, once last year and three years before. And then during the three years before the first time I’d left, when I came back to fundraise, my boss had actually told me and a bunch of my coworkers that were still there. They said, Oh, a bunch of people at Amazon kept asking where you were. So it had really surprised me that people at Amazon and Microsoft and those people that I had gotten to sign up had actually remembered me personally. Just from standing on the street and asking them to donate monthly for children’s charity.

Fabian: Well, that’s really cool. That’s a really cool part. And I can relate because I just remember like the Wyndham piece, you know, stopping people is very challenging. It’s not a competition, which one was more challenging. Obviously, I think a donation is.

Tyalor: They were both pretty hard.

Fabian: Yup. Just in general people don’t, especially that kind of crowd. West coast people are more friendly and open than East coast, but these people are probably very busy tech-oriented people that have a tight schedule and they are on a mission to go somewhere. And because of that, stopping them is challenging. 

I think one of the things that is so special about a job like that is you’re relationship building. What you were describing is relationship building and it’s why I loved sales. Once I did the timeshare thing and I continued in my sales career, I realized that relationship building was one of the things that like lit me up.

I had an almost more of an account management role, so I would keep seeing the same people maybe once a month, at least like, uh, doctors or whatever. And over the course of a year, like I changed, they changed, maybe they had a kid, maybe they got married, whatever, right? You actually are having a relationship with them. Like, it’s more professional, but you can also be friends in a way. So I thought that was always something that was really cool to me. I didn’t know that I would’ve liked that so much and it sounds to me like that was one piece for you. Would you agree?

Tyalor: It’s very enjoyable because you get to meet and learn about a bunch of different people and it’s very interesting how people react in certain ways in how you talk and socialize with them.

Fabian:  Do you feel like the reason most people sink in sales is because they just cannot handle the aspect of rejection? Because you’re constantly, constantly, constantly getting rejected or blown off, or even like sometimes insulted for like trying to stop them. Like, do you think it’s that? Or is there something else that goes behind it and how did you handle that piece?

Tyalor: Most of the people that didn’t make it, was mostly because of the rejection. This one person had just like had a mental breakdown, um, because someone had told them that they’re wasting their time or to F off. It also gave me a perspective on also how cruel people can actually be too, uh, for, for no, no apparent reason at all. You just even look at them sometimes, they just like tell you to F off or that say leave, you’re wasting my time.

Fabian: Every person’s different, but it really says a lot about them. Let’s just say it’s a kid is doing this job. You know what it is, and he’s trying to get donations and you’re telling him all this stuff and insulting him, it’s like, come on. Maybe that was you 12 years ago. The fact that they are doing that, I mean, it says a lot about their happiness and their fulfillment and their insecurity or whatever. That’s how I view it to make myself understand it because otherwise I’m like, why are people doing it? You know? Like, why are you hating on random people on the street that you don’t know.

Tyalor: For me personally, the rejection, that didn’t really bug me. Throughout, I think elementary school to middle school, I was like bullied. Mostly for me, just ignoring it eventually and being the bigger person. Thinking this person is saying this for a reason.

Fabian: I think a lot of people don’t look enough into their past, because I think a lot of who we, I mean, who we are today is literally defined by our past, like, little things. So, I’m curious to hear, do you feel like that bullying and all that stuff, did it cause you to have like this down period or did it build like some insecurity in you? Or was, was there ever any aftermath to that or did you just like get older and overcome it or did you move away somewhere and know people in bullying more? Tell me more about that piece.

Tyalor: I think it’s mostly the way that my parents raised me. Um, just mostly because they’re like, Hey, let it go, they might be having something going on at home. And I, I think the reason that it didn’t really quite affect me is because I knew that they probably did. People who do bully have like some insecurities or things that are going on in their life that they can’t quite get away from.

Fabian: They’re almost like lashing out. Uh, what they receiving they’re like passing it forward to make themselves feel better, in a way.

Tyalor: Lashing out from the anger.

Fabian: Yup. So seeing that you kind of, and your parents constantly, like reinforcing that thought, you kind of understood where it was coming from. So you really didn’t let it affect you? I mean, I respect that and admire that. I wish I would have had like that mental fortitude. It didn’t destroy me, but it definitely got to me in a way.

Tyalor: I think more of the recognition of that happening is me realizing it while I was in college. And hearing people will be like, Oh, you’re a little bit fat. You need to lose weight. It wasn’t like, Oh, I feel down. Right. It was just like, I knew I had to lose weight, but it was also to a point where it didn’t quite affect me. And then later on, like after high school and then college, I had actually looked back at my pictures and I look at myself now and I’m like, I actually lost a lot of weight from high school. You always think that when you’re in high school, that that’s how you are going to look for like the rest of your life. And there’s so much more even now that I, I need to learn personally. There’s always more things to do and more things to learn as you go through life.

And I remember one worker, it’s kind of strange, this guy worked at Amazon and I remember him telling me “all these people are sheep that work at Amazon”. But the funny thing was he worked at Amazon and I kind of stared at him. I was like, wait, but you, you work here too. He’s like, well, yeah, but I don’t do all this stuff.  He’s like, don’t settle for too little. I was like, What do you mean? He’s like, don’t get used to how you feel right now. Don’t get stuck in a loop of doing the same things over and over and over again. 

And every time I saw him, he’s like, Hey, how are you doing today? Did you hit your quota? Stuff like that? He’s like, what are you doing tomorrow? And he’d always be asking me if I was doing something else or learning something else. And at the time I was learning a little bit more Vietnamese and he’s like, Oh, that’s good, you’re improving. And over the course of like six months, I would see him every day. And then just, he was just gone after that. 

Fabian: Well, that’s a really good story. I actually would love to have met that guy because he sounds like exactly the way I started thinking a few years ago. I mean, it already started a while back, but very much so recently.  

I say this to everyone, not just you, but when you’re young, like don’t, you don’t need to rush it, but you should always be working to, you know, learn something or change something or improve something. And it could literally be, by the way, like even just getting better at a video game. Just so people realize, it doesn’t have to be anything drastic, life changing, but if this game is something that matters to you, it’s bringing you happiness. Like getting better at it or improving, like that could actually be very worthwhile in your life, but you’re still constantly improving.

And that’s one of the things that, I mean, shout out to the Chaminger brand, is like always be improving is such a key thing. What that guy said, people, most people are, I wouldn’t necessarily use the word sheep anymore, but I understand that, I’ve used it in the past, it’s basically everyone, they’re followers. They’re not, they’re not the leader, they’re not lions, they just want to see what everyone else does. And they’re going to try to fit in and mold themselves to that. So then, you know, years go by and you’re doing the same thing and that’s it. They’re going to be doing that same job forever. 

And it kind of goes back to your fundraising situation, man. It’s like, Hey, um, it’s a great job, it’s a great opportunity. Like you got some really good skills that you might not even realize are worth a lot. That if you learn how to sell yourself and market yourself, you could probably like climb the ladder just because you had that experience. But I think being able to constantly improve and change yourself and not like conform into that is such a big thing. So that was some really good advice.

Tyalor:  I’ve heard that before and usually it doesn’t quite click the first time, right? When you hear things like that. Oh, okay, this person is giving me some information, but hearing it from my parents, hearing it from him, um, just also hearing it in videos. 

That’s the reason I wanted to travel to Vietnam as well. My wife being from there, but it’s seeing new perspectives and exploring new things is probably the most valuable thing besides education.

Fabian: Well, let’s talk about that. So one of the big things of this Social Wisdom series is that I want to have people on, like yourself, that have a story to tell. That have your own journey, you know, the ups and downs, but there is a few key things that you’ve identified and felt like have really helped you improve or change your life. Would you say that one of them is that you have actually left the United States? You’ve traveled and you’ve seen different environments. You’ve seen a third world country. You’ve seen places where you can buy a full meal at $1. Would you say that’s one of them?

Tyalor: Yeah, it definitely is. I think the one thing that made me realize the most was like Jamaica and Vietnam were the two biggest things that had actually made me realize that financially, you should be secure. But also, it won’t lead to you being happy. Money doesn’t buy happiness. 

In Jamaica they had met, um, I think it was a tour guide, and then as we were driving, all the houses were like a quarter way built and people were living in them and they weren’t even fully complete houses. My father had asked him, why are these houses not completed? Why, why are they just all, you know, stone and then a window and that’s it? And there’s a bunch of framework for the rest of the house. And the guy was like, Oh, they take like 20 to 30 years to build the houses because they’re on an Island. So they have to have everything imported from other countries and other places because they don’t have enough resources on the Island itself. And seeing that and how happy the people who were there just also made me think, a bunch of money won’t make me happy. 

My first trip to Vietnam, I was kind of expecting it to be like Japan, in a way. Where like, you know, lights, there’s neon everywhere. It’s like the night life’s really like picking up, everyone’s drinking. There’s tons of like people partying, like a party life at night. 

I got there, to Vietnam, and it kind of was underwhelming for me at first. You’re expecting all these skyscrapers, all this nightlife, all these cars and stuff like that. And then you get there at like, I think I had arrived there 1:00 AM, so there wasn’t anyone out and it was like dark. We had stopped by this restaurant on the side of the road to get pho and that was my first meal in Vietnam. 

I didn’t have any cash at the time. So, uh, her parents had paid for us and I was like, Oh, how much is this? My wife’s like, Oh no, no, no. Don’t don’t, don’t worry about it, it was only like $5. And there was like six of us. I was like, okay, this is something I can get with. 

Going through like downtown Saigon, walking around, seeing people, they were happy. Even the homeless people, like you can’t even tell they’re homeless, because they probably had housing by the government. But very little people that were just sitting on the street begging for money. If they didn’t have money, they would be working and you interact with these people, and even if I couldn’t speak Vietnamese at that time, they were very inviting and caring and happy to see that someone is there visiting them or buying food from them.

And that’s also something that had shocked me because I spent half of the month in the city, in downtown Saigon and then the other half in the countryside. So I’m talking about like a city about the size of maybe a big high school, the population felt like 500, 600 in that little tiny town. And, Oh man, that was probably most like at peace I’ve ever actually felt.

Fabian: Do you like that?

Tyalor: Yeah, I loved it. You’re on vacation for a month and you’re just sitting there relaxing, sitting in a hammock, drinking a beer, or having pho for 25 cents or going for a smoothie for like 50 cents. I think that’s the best I’ve ever felt in my life is like going to Vietnam and just relaxing and seeing that money doesn’t really make you happy.

Fabian: And without necessarily having all the luxuries and the hustle and bustle and everything like that. Like sometimes the simplicity is the more important piece.

Tyalor: I need to improve, like my mindset on this stuff. Finding ways to like earn a steady income, but not to the point where it’s like, I’m crippled by it. Just like enjoying moments, like the vacation, enjoying moments to just relax and enjoy life.

Fabian: I love that you said that, man. I mean, that’s such a powerful realization. It’s interesting to me that you had it happen to you in a similar way. I mean, I had an up and down, but because I grew up traveling so much and living in third world countries, like actually living there, also vacationing, but mostly living, it gave me like this humility and this perspective very early on. It’s just like, Whoa. Like the people in the U.S. are living a completely different world than everywhere else pretty much. I mean, there’s Europe and like you said, Japan, Tokyo, those places are much more similar. But you go to some place, like you said, like Vietnam, you go to Cozumel, you go to Jamaica, I lived in Jamaica, and you go in the not touristy area. And like I said, there’s these homes that are broken down. You’re walking by and there’s literally, like I had to walk to school, and every day I would walk by like just random families like just sitting out front in they’re like half broken shack smoking weed, you know, at like 8:00 AM. Imagine seeing that as a kid, you’re like, Whoa, what’s happening. And then they have like their goats and their chickens that are like walking next to them on their bicycle. It’s just a completely different world. 

And I’m worried about, you know, what, I’m going to eat tonight. I’m worried about, Oh, where are we going to go on a vacation? I’m worried about, when am I going to get new shoes? It really puts things in perspective very quickly. And you’re like, okay, like those things just, they don’t matter in the grand scheme of things, like maybe short-term and that’s such a powerful thing to realize at a young age. I mean, even realizing it at 21, 22, 23, like it already puts you at a different level than so many other people, man. It’s a reality check and it makes you kind of reprioritize things. 

Realizing that money, doesn’t get you everything. Like, I think money’s awesome. Getting that freedom, you know, to do what you want, where you want, but I worked in sales. It’s very high paying potential and the harder you work, the more you can earn. But then it’s like, you’re working so much, you’re stressing out, pressure of quota, all these things, and then you get it and then you’re like, okay, this is awesome. But now what? You know, is this it? Like now I don’t have time to actually spend it with the people that I care about or all these things and that’s when you start taking a step back. So I love that you said that, like, I would summarize what you said as it’s really just like that perspective and humility, but I’m curious if you agree with that. 

Tyalor: It kind of made me bitter in a way when I came back, uh, the first time from Vietnam. I went back to work to fundraise for the same company. It made me very bitter at that job, about what people had complained about. Like the stuff that they would tell me why they can’t stop and talk or donate to a charity.

It kinda made my perspective on what Americans think of like necessities. So like when you’re out in public and you hear someone say, Oh my phone’s on 10% right after you come back from third world country, it kind of does make you a little bit bitter of like how people see that. 

There’s actually people in these countries that are living on, like, I think Vietnam’s average salary is about  $700 a month and they’re happier than the people who are making double, triple, even quadruple what they’re making. It made me very grateful for what I have. All this that I have right now, don’t take it for granted, enjoy it. 

Fabian: I love a man. So you would say the key to having a better life is traveling and expanding your horizons. Would you agree with that?

Tyalor: Yeah, definitely. Nas Daily and Drew Binsky, they’re two guys that travel around the world and they’ve done like collab videos a lot. I think Nas Daily has traveled to all the countries in the world and his horizons on like perspectives on how people act, how people see politics, how people, um, see life and their outcome of life is way more than what I think anyone can get. But he has expanded that by traveling to these other countries and seeing and experiencing it himself.

Fabian: Well, I love that you shared that because, um, one of the things that I was gonna bring up right before, which is very relevant that you said, you know this guy traveled so much and had so much more knowledge and perspective. As you keep watching, make sure you join the live streams, man. Like I think you should interact and, you know, hype people up, get them on. I want this to be very conversational, build a community and have people like share these kinds of stories. I think a lot of people just need an avenue to share.

 But the game is really access of knowledge. So what do I mean by that? There’s just so much out there that most people are just not aware of. Like you said, let’s talk about American, sorry Americans were foreigners, we’re gonna criticize you guys a little bit. They just live in like this bubble, right? And it’s a great, like, there’s no reason that they don’t have to change, but once they start complaining and all these things. It’s like, Hey guys, there’s so much more out there. And once you check it out, you realize, Oh, Hey, well now you know about this country. Now, you know about this country. Now, you know about currency, now you know about in Vietnam, they make this much money and the cost of living is this. As you start learning, you know, you start growing because of that, you just have so much more knowledge. 

But here comes the other part, there is a dark side to knowledge. And what do I mean by that? Because if you, once you know these things, you can’t go back. Like now I’m aware of, Hey, There’s so much more in the world, the beauty of traveling, the, you know, money, isn’t this be all, end all. And I almost, I’m glad I have knowledge. I don’t regret it, but there’s times where I’m just like, ah, like when you hear someone say something, you just know it’s wrong. So curious to know what you feel about that piece. Like the access of knowledge, like blessing and a curse.

Tyalor: There was several times where like for fundraising, where you get to the point when you’re in sales where you can influence what someone does. In a way it’s subtle things where you implant that seed in their brain and they’re like doing it.  For example, I don’t know if this would kind of relate to it, but like my parents. As a kid, you want gifts for Christmas. So the older you get, you realize that it’s not, the big fat man isn’t there.

Fabian: Oh no kids don’t watch this. You guys didn’t hear anything.

Tyalor: The older I got, I knew that was not a thing. So by like middle school, I had used it to like, Oh, what’s he getting me for Christmas? And I don’t think they had quite realized that I knew, up until I was too old, to like, I would say 11th grade. I kind of had abused that, but I’m pretty sure by like 10th or 9th, they knew.

 People can be so much more easily influenced when you have that knowledge. Especially when fundraising, like one reason people will be like, Oh, why can’t you donate? And I wouldn’t say it’d be manipulating in a bad way, but there are ways that that can be used in a better way. It’s something like where you have to kind of hold yourself back from doing that because you know, it’s not right.

Fabian: Well, let’s talk about that for a second, man. Um, do you feel like that was a skillset, going back to something that I asked you way before, is that you got kind of like from your fundraising? I know that you mentioned that you did it already as a kid and I mean, a lot of kids are good at it. Basically what you’re describing was that you started learning social skills, to a certain extent. You started understanding human psychology, body language and that’s how you get better at sales and all this stuff and communication. But you’re right, there comes a point where, like you said, you can manipulate people. And you’re right, you have to basically take a step back and be like, well, no, I can’t do that. But it’s scary. I mean, what are your thoughts on that? 

Tyalor: Yeah. It was like psychologically. It was just like, there was always a game that we would do, um, fundraising.  It was kind of a fun game where, you would do something, like hand motion, facial gesture and the person that you were talking to would actually copy what you would do and they would do it unconsciously.

When someone would stop and talk, they would have a closed like position. So they’d be sitting there like this, listening to you. And then if you took a step back, like if I’m this close to someone or this close to someone talking to them, if I took a step back, they would open up and be more open. 

So I think the negative part of that and the dark side of that is, it’s scary. It honestly is scary knowing that you can do that and have some influence how they act in a certain way, just based off your own facial expressions or their facial expressions and being able to tell what they’re thinking. 

Fabian: Well, let’s start, uh, let’s start concluding here, because this, this has been a great talk man. One of the key things that we talk about is success, right? Mindset, perspective, all these other things. But one of the things that I think a lot of people in today’s day and age really, like, hyper-focus on is, Oh, I need to be successful, I need to be successful. We have a definition here at Chaminger and I want to know what you think about the definition and what would you say is success to you? So the way we define it is, it’s success is the point where you feel great with what you have currently accomplished in your life. You’re happy with yourself, with your worth, with your value and you don’t feel the need to have other people validate it.

So that is how we define it and how I have found myself feeling successful. Curious, what are your thoughts on that? And then what would you say is a good definition for it, if you had to give one.

Tyalor: I would say that success is like basically being able to not be stuck in a constant loop. But also enjoying life and also, um, being at peace with what you’re doing and who you’re with. 

Fabian: Got it. Well, leave us your thoughts on, I know we talked about it throughout the entire episode, but on the concept of always be improving, I kind of want to hear your concluding thoughts.

Tyalor: I think this is one thing for always be improving, is don’t get too comfortable, always want to learn something new.

Fabian: I love it. I love it. That’s that’s a perfect summary of what we talked about. So Taylor, thanks so much for being on this episode of Social Wisdom. Now is the part where you get to talk about anything that is relevant to you. Whatever it is that you want to mention and shout out. 

Tyalor: The shout out is mostly to people who have been in my life and are in my life right now. I think mostly you and sales for like work-wise. The sales aspect of it was pretty big for me. And meeting you in Wyndham was probably like, it was kinda weird to me, like how, how you’re so happy and the sales part of it was just so exhausting. But you were like, able to keep doing that, just go through that, like it was nothing. I think that also makes me who I am socially as well, from sales and doing the things that I do now and how I interact with people in certain ways.

Fabian: Awesome, man. I love it. Well, I’m glad that I could inspire you seeing that because at the end of the day, that’s, what more does anyone really want? You know, create a legacy, help people out. The key takeaway from Taylor Yu, is travel guys, you will learn so much, you’ll expand so much.

Tyalor: Travel, learn, learn a new language. Last shout out is I think the person who most importantly made me who I am, is my wife, because as much as she may yell at me for doing stupid stuff, that also makes me a better person.

Fabian: Blink four times if she’s there and she made you say that.

All right, man. Well, I appreciate you. Thanks for, for hopping on and see you guys next time on Social Wisdom.

Hey, my fellow Chamingers, thanks so much for experiencing the Social Wisdom of the week. We hope you absorbed as much as you could. Please leave a comment if you learned something or if you have another guest whose wisdom you’d love to hear. If the message is helping you, please remember to check out our Ko-fi donation page so we can also Become Xceptional. Follow our journey on all our social medias and subscribe so you will never miss an opportunity to #BeASponge. Chaminger out.